corbeau: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]

Absolutely my mother's death. August 14th, 2005. I'll never get the date out of my head. I'll never forget the way it felt when they told us that the blood in her brain would not subside. That there was no hope. I'll never forget hearing my father make the decision to turn off the life support. The minute the machines went off and Momma left us.

August 17th, 2005. The funeral. Touching her cold hand knowing that I'd never feel the brush against my forehead again. I'd never hear her laugh. I'd never watch her fix that long beautiful hair again. I'd never hug her.

So many things good happened after that day. So many things bad happened after that day. I hate that I didn't call Adam sooner so that he could have met her at least one day before she died. So that she would know that I found the perfect person. The one I had been looking for so long. I hate that my Father couldn't step up and be the man he could have been. Instead he collapsed into the man I always knew he was. My Mother raised us. My MOMMA did everything. She clothed us and listened to us and fed us and knew every little thing about us. He knew nothing and wanted to know nothing. The only thing WE, his children, were and always have been to him is a status symbol. He only ever cared what we did when we did something good because it made HIM look good.

Being able to leave my relationship with my Father behind was sad. But in the long run it has been so freeing.

I am an orphan now. But it's ok. I have my husband. I have my sisters. I have my stepson. I have my wonderful in-laws who love me. I have so much.

I just wish I still had my Momma to share it with.
Music:: Landslide - Fleetwood Mac

Reply

From:
Anonymous( )Anonymous This account has disabled anonymous posting.
OpenID( )OpenID You can comment on this post while signed in with an account from many other sites, once you have confirmed your email address. Sign in using OpenID.
User
Account name:
Password:
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
Subject:
HTML doesn't work in the subject.

Message:

 
Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.

January

SunMonTueWedThuFriSat
      1
 
2
 
3
 
4
 
5
 
6
 
7
 
8
 
9
 
10
 
11
 
12
 
13
 
14 15
 
16
 
17
 
18
 
19
 
20
 
21
 
22
 
23
 
24
 
25
 
26
 
27
 
28
 
29
 
30
 
31